Sensory Integration

I went to a seminar at Watchdog Early Education Center about Sensory Integration. I find the most informative is to focus on the basic underline factor of the basic function of the senses. And for a child that has mild delays is to give him a chance to feed him the input till it is no longer needed at certain stage of development. I think most teachers lack the training of each child is different. That is why the cookie cutter education is going to eventually suffer. And another good point is that we live in a society that doesn't allow play as a factor of learning. The open field to explore.

We all based our existence on memories and what is learned in our surrounding environment. And if those memories are not established that is why children would likely have issues. Just like an orphan baby who only stares at a plain white walls and during that precious period of time he should be held by someone who cares and feel all the stimulation of being held tightly.

One important point of senses ... what three ties in with sensory integration?

- Vestibular - works 24 hours a day because it is how your body relate to space. It is in the inner ears with three connecting tubes with fluids that controls balance and how we relate to gravity.

- Proprioceptive - are muscles and joints. The amount of pressure you feel when you walk on your feet vs on your toes.

- Tactile - helps with the basic of touch and feeling - cold, hot and pain for the basics.

These 3 senses receive the most input. And of course each are link to the other senses. If you enhance vestibular input in works hand in hand with visual input. Hands eyes coordination for example when you play baseball.

Bummer ... non acceptance letter

Two weeks ago my son went for a school interview. And now he got non acceptance letter ... this was at Norwegian International School. I feel that it is a waste of time. I told them he has speech delay. I mean how do you feel if you have speech delay and get put in a group of people who speaks perfectly normal.  I rather that they said no we do not take kids like him and I save my HKD 900.00 to pay for his speech therapy.

Is non social a crime? I don't know. We just moved and my child is trying to cope with the moving to a new culture. Anyways they are probably not the right school for him. So I shouldn't be jaded. Sigh.

Good for fine motor skills and creativity

I love these ... They are large beads easy for small hands to handle the amount of challenge to arrange on a peg board. I bought them at Toys R Us Hong Kong at Festival Walk. You can really get creative with these and also learn about colors, creating patterns and counting the beads. Have a little patience and good for fine motor skills.

Competition tantrums

I still haven't found a perfect solution to deal with my son who has to get his way in winning board games if not all hell break loose. It happened today in his class as I observed him on the monitor. There were 5 students taking turns and round one is over he didn't win the game, he threw a tantrum.

I have enforced a number one rule with board games.

1. Anyone can win, if you lose don't cry or we are not going to start the game.
    Can you agreed to this rule? if YES then we can play if NO we cannot play.

2. The rule of the game is to take turns. Everyone will have a turn. You cannot skip ahead.
    Pick who is going to go first and then second, third or forth.
    Then remind again about the first rule.

3. The actually game rule. Read the rules of the game. Then repeat the first and second rules.

Halloween: candies for kiddies

My choices available in Hong Kong are


Organic Yummy Earth Candies at Little Giant or Three Sixty


Gluten Free
Egg Free
Dairy Free
Peanut Free
Tree Nut Free
NO High Fructose Corn Syrup
Wheat Free
Soy Free
Casein Free
No artificial colors
No artificial flavors

Enjoy Life Chocolate Bars at Little Giant

Made in a dedicated nut free, gluten free facility, soy free, casein free, vegan, kosher

boom Choco boom crispy rice bar

Evaporated Cane Juice; Non-Dairy Cocoa Butter; Natural Chocolate Liquor (Non-Alcoholic); Rice Crisps (Rice Flour, Rice Bran, Raisin Juice, Honey, Salt); Rice Milk Powder (Rice Syrup Powder, Rice Starch, Rice Flour, Salt, Carrageenan); Salt

boom Choco boom dark chocolate

Evaporated Cane Juice; Natural Chocolate Liquor (Non-Alcoholic); Non-Dairy Cocoa Butter

Food additives - sugars and artificial colors

I am appalled, yet I do it once in awhile giving ultimately bad combination of food to my children. I am probably as guilty as any parents and after even been informed of how bad sugar is and artificial colors are I will have the mentality of "oh it is just for today."


And sitting in the waiting room at an occupational therapy office watching a parent giving her child junk food and gatorade or vitamin water was like a blasphemy to why do the child even need OT. So I learn that there is no shortcut to giving bad food to your children. 


Looking at labels is gruesome but some smart decision has to be made if you can't read and interpret the label as to any food group categories DON'T BUY THEM!!! Food label are getting smarter in disguising things they call food. I try to by more produce and less processed food. Something like inverted glucose syrup or inverted sugar have high fructose corn syrup derivative.


inverted sugar - a mixture of equal parts of glucose and fructose resulting from the hydrolysis of sucrose. it is found naturally in fruits and honey and produced artificially for use in the food industry. 


So may as well go with the real thing with a dash of honey with naturally made nutrients that function as antioxidants. The food industry of course want to cut cost and produce food that have a shelf life of 6 months to a year. And inverted sugar is sweeter than regular sugar so less for more bangs and lacks anything that is good for you.


Read Cathy's blog 
http://alifelesssweet.blogspot.com/2009/05/because-you-askedinvert-sugar.html


So what to use in replace of sugar :
honey
agave nectar - a small amount goes a long way and it has a lower glycemic index and glycemic load than table sugar or sucrose.
stevia


And of course anything consumed to the max is not good anyways so use sparingly cause sugar is sugar and sweet is sweet. 


What the heck is modified starch? I don't even want to know. 


The only starch I will use are:
arrowroot
tapioca
potato


Any neon artificially colored food and candies ... please avoid all. Now the food industry are replacing names with numbers and of course parents doesn't have the time to look up a bunch of numbers to find what the stuff actually is good or bad. 


Here is an index of color numbers in food ... you can find out for yourself what to avoid completely.


http://www.gluten-dairy-free.co.uk/Food%20Colouring.htm

Tangle in all colors, textures and sizes

I was visiting Mega Show at the Hong Kong Convention and Exhibition Centre in Wan Chai. And I found the Tangle Creations booth. It is a serendipity. I really really love the Tangle and so does Theo and Clem. I also met Nicholas Zawitz who is the son of Richard Zawitz. Zawitz senior is the designer of the Tangle.

Tangle began with an idea of infinity and zen!

Nicholas gave us some promo items and a fuzzy Tangle. Clem was engrossed with the fuzzy tangle when I gave it to her.

It is a fidget toy, it is calming toy, it is visual and as it is tactile.

We love Tangles!

Fuzzy is a gift and Nubby is the one I purchased for Clem awhile back.

Fever that never go away

My poor Theo has been having this nasty viral fever since last Thursday. And he is still having a fever. Now developed into sore throat. I went to the doctors 4 times as of today.

The first fever lasted from Thursday to Saturday and he was fever free Sunday and Monday. Then the fever came back Tuesday at 102. The first set of fever was symptom free. And now he has a sore throat.
I gave him fever reducer with homeopathic remedies.

Ibuprofen taken every 8 hours.
Belladonna and Mercurius Solubilis both at 200 and taken 4 pills every 4 hours interval.
Lung Calm syrup 3 times a day,

Worksheets and Games for developments

I came across this wonderful website created by a teacher and a grandma called School Sparks.

http://www.schoosparks.com

I was looking for some exercises I can do with Theo to increase his audio processing skills. And also his vocabulary. I have seen much improvements with his English from June to now. He as been going to speech therapy twice a week with two different speech therapists. Both speech therapists work on similar concepts, but with different approach.

The more we practice, the more we improve as a team. Of course there is always a down time.

I also purchased some games for the children. Zingo games by ThinkFun. I got the Bingo with a Zing and Number Bingo. Playing game helps makes learning fun. Today we learn about matching pictures and taking turns getting the tiles. The numbers game help with counting and number memories. These games are for age 4 and up. Great for kinders.

Helicopter mom

So this is term that my mom told me about that I was not aware of coined for the 21st century mom or dad or just parents in general term.

Helicopter hovers and parents hovers their children 24/7. I think back in our parents' generation their parents have more children other than just them plus one. My mom came from a family of 8 children and my dad came from a family of 7 children. Their moms can't possibility watch all of them. There were hired help, nanny or maid. And they are not considered precious as compared to now having one child and that child is the golden boy or girl.

My aunt was a helicopter mom with her only "heart and liver" son. She didn't want him to go off to college because he doesn't know how to do the basic of looking after himself, but eventually he left to college and now he is a very successful person, husband and father of twins. My second cousin's paw paw told my aunt that she should let her son go. It will be good for him. And paw paw also told her side of the story of how she let her only son go to college and now her grand child is going to college too and how proud she is of her son's accomplishment.

Paw paw also continued on to a story about her friend who didn't let her son go off to find himself and eventually she passed away and her son doesn't have the education to get him by for a career that he wanted. He works odds and ends jobs and now at age 40, it is too late to turn back time. He has no money to go for school and he barely can make ends meet.

I have let go a lot and have my nanny take care of most of the things involving the children. I may not be a 100 percent helicopter but my tendency goes with therapies. I never miss if possible their therapies session unless I really can't do it or if one of them are sick. On the other hand, I would let them fall, hurt, fight and even touch the hot stove if they willingly wish to do so and learn from it. My youngest even got scratched by a poodle on the face. I felt miserable at that time thinking how I could have let that happened and never had a nanny watch her again for a long period of time.

But I reasoned how do I not be a helicopter mom if my children have problems that even any schools cannot accept them and want to change them to make them easier to teach or be compliance?

I want to focus on the positive and turned what is negative into positive.

Man-made chemicals and the human race

The other day I came across a documentary film on Discovery Health channel called "The Disappearing Male." It is about what our children are suffering in this progress of the human race. We have the abilities to solve problems, but in solving them we added toxin to our environment.

http://topdocumentaryfilms.com/the-disappearing-male/

I am sure any parents would want to find out what is causing their children to have sensory processing disorder or dyslexia or any other developmental illnesses or issues that may come up.

It is the least talk about when it comes to toxic chemicals and we probably take things for granted what all those preservatives in food or in shampoos will do to us and even in our children's toys. Have we strive to live in the world of conveniences that we are losing the most basic?

In the last 50 years we have more toxin made by us and it is now a part of our DNA and we will suffer from it.

Right now people are looking into what cause autism, adhd, sensory processing disorder, etc which is not something seem as forefront until now. Autism is unheard of until around the 1960s. So to look at the timeline of what chemicals were produced from the past 50 years until right now and we are in the time of a crises.

I do hope China realizes that as a production country, it is a backlash.

It is a real double edge sword ... progress or not to progress. Just like wheat is a double edge sword ... simply we cannot just stop industrialized and processed food ... because that is the wonder of the human progress to feed the masses bad food, then use medication to offset what the bad food had done to them plus having side effect.

I guess I am a romantic idealist ... so sometimes being ignorant is bliss.

Tiger Mother finding The Element

Why is Amy Chua so controversial? I don't think it is harsh when you want to teach a child life lessons, but just hope that your child will not make a big mistake when we the parents are not around.

I read her book in a week in-between taking my kids to schools and to therapies. As a parents you know the amount of potential your children have, but they need absolute guidance. And as a parents you do just that because children have no self control and you are the only baseline they have. 

Some say she is patronizing? is Amy Chau really patronizing? to whom? to the readers? does it depends on the walk of life you take? She is just telling a story from her point of view and everyone is entitled just that -- an observation. 

I finally threw out the iPads my children love spending time with and it was the best thing that I have done for them besides all the therapies I think they need and will need. Just like violin or piano lessons. My husband is probably like Jed. And I am the crazy mom. I am still trying to figure out my children's weaknesses and see how I can turn those around to be their strengths. It is a slow process, but I am getting there.

I think some people doesn't realize that Amy Chua was also in a learning curve as a parents. No parents are perfect even if you consider yourself a Tiger Parents. At the end she found her middle ground with her youngest Lulu. It is like finding your Element.

I also finished reading The Element by Sir Ken Robinson. I find that really straight forward read and with a mixed of British humor. Maybe as parents we should find our own Element and translate that to our children and teach them if you do things well with passion it will show. But passion takes a lot of commitment just like how Amy Chua enforced in piano and violin practice. I don't know if you should force the child to do something that they don't like to do. But if your child is willing to follow your advice then it is a good thing.

My mom tried to make me play the piano. She tried so much that I begged her please I can't take it anymore. I can't really sit still for it. I have no patience for it. I am not really musically incline at all. I am not much of a music person to begin with. Later on I love art. She asked me if I want to do art instead. I said yes. So I tried and I love it. I was enrolled in oil painting classes and drawing classes. I am not a particularly great artist or natural one, but I really love it.

Then I became a graphic designer. I enrolled to fine arts program at USC then to graphic design program at Art Center College of Design. I was on the roll. I want to help my children find their drives to be successful.

Sometimes being good at playing the piano doesn't mean you enjoy doing it unless you enjoy doing it so much that practice equals fun. Same goes with being an artist or just taking on drawing. It takes commitment and practice to get your foundation down then you can go off and break all the rules you want to be innovative and to be outrageous in the field.

To turn something into a career it is all about passion. My auntie J gave us her life lesson, if you want to be successful you should not be afraid to fail. Failing means you tried then not try at all. You put your all into it. Your time to it and it will show itself and people would want to be around you. And eventually money will come your way for you to make a living for what you enjoy the most. If you think about money first then you will never get anything done.

EVOO cookies recipe

These cookies are adapted from Allyson from manifest:vegan

The original recipe is lemon olive oil cookies:
http://www.manifestvegan.com/2011/06/lemon-olive-oil-cookies/

Since my Clem can't have lemon in anything I took lemon juice out and sub with rice milk and I also sub almond meal with flax seed meal and chia seed since she can't have almond neither.

Dry ingredients:

1 cup of sorghum flour

1 cup of brown rice flour

1/2 cup of potato starch

1/2 cup of brown sugar

1 teaspoon of xantham gum

1 teaspoon of baking soda

Egg sub:

1/8 cup of flax seed meal

1/8 cup of chia seed

1/2 cup of warm water

Wet ingredients:

1/2 cup of extra virgin olive oil

1/2 cup of rice milk

4 tablespoons of agava

Directions:

01 Preheat oven at 200 C

02 Egg substitute mixed flax seed meal, chia seed and warm water and set those aside for 15 minutes so they can form into a gel and sticky texture

03 Mix all the dry ingredients into a bowl. Mix them well.

04 Mix all the wet ingredients into a bowl. Mix them well.

05 Pour the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and mix them well. Then add in the egg substitute. Mix and mix and mix.

06 Roll cookie dough into rounds and press down each piece with a spoon and place them 2 inches apart on a cookie sheet.

07 Bake for 12 - 15 minutes.

EVOO cookie dough.

It is crispy on the outside and chewy inside.

Celebrating a gluten free birthday

Today is Clemmie's birthday.

I was just too busy to trial and error a cake recipe so I resulted into purchasing a cake mix by 1 2 3 Gluten Free called Devil's Food Cake Mix! I found those at Little Giant located at Causeway Bay.
1 2 3 Gluten Free also has Buckwheat Pancakes mix which is very awesome. My kiddies love those. 

I was cheating a bit cause I couldn't find palm shortening anywhere?! ... I mean anywhere in Hong Kong that is. I even looked at gourmet food stores and found no palm shortening. So I used a whole stick of butter instead. Clemmie could actually go on dairy rotation, but not recommended.

And I used cream cheese for frosting.

For frosting:

1 pack of cream cheese usually 200g
1 to 2 Tablespoons of agava depending on how sweet you want your frosting to be
1 Tablespoon of rice milk just to loosing the cream cheese and make it batter like
6 small strawberries chopped up and add to the mixture

For the cake batter I did change up the recipe from the box a bit.

For cake batter I added these to the premixed flour:

1 stick of butter usually 200g
1/8 cup of chia seed
1/8 cup of flax seed meal
1/2 cup of warm water
1/2 cup of brown sugar
4 Tablespoons of agava
3 cup of rice milk

Pre heat oven at 375 F. 

Soak the chia seed and flax seed meal in 1/2 cup of warm water.

Butter beat till creamy with a mixer. Add brown sugar and beat. Add chia and flax mix and beat.

Add 1 cup of rice milk and beat. Slowly add in the cake mix.

Then add in more rice milk. Then more cake mix.

Repeat until it is thick and gooey.

I have a convection oven. It takes 30 minutes at 375 F.

Wilbarger and Speech Therapy

Starting the 2011-2012 school year September 1st. Clemmie is going to Watchdog and ESF Wu Kai Sha and Theo is going to French International School.

Clemmie's OT Ms. Wincy at Watchdog started us on the protocol because of Clemmie's sensory seeking and tactile defensiveness. She said to start with 6 sessions of brushing and compression every two hours. So far I put in 4 sessions each day during the weekends and I was able to put in 3 sessions today and probably for the rest of the school days I can at least put in 3 sessions.

It is very easy to do. Clemmie didn't like it very much at first, she wouldn't let me complete the brushing and compression. And everything takes less than 5 minutes to complete.

I go in a circle starting from the right hand, her back, left hand to left leg and ends on her left arm. I go back and forth with the brush, but if your child is too sensitive you should start with going one direction only.

I start by holding her by her right wrist with her right hand palm up and brush up the palm of the hand all the way to her upper arm and back down and do that 3 times then turn her right palm face down and brush all the way up and back down three times. Then cross over to her shoulder and hold her by the  to her back and do the W shape 3 times back and forth. Hold her left hand palm up and brush up and down the arm three times and then left hand palm down brush up and down three times. Then hold the left ankle as you hold the left wrist then let go of the left wrist as if you are continuing with the brushing down to her legs in the same manner then to the other leg.

Compressions that I do for Clemmie are her fingers and toes. Just pulling and pushing of the joints, then her shoulders and elbows by pressing on her shoulder awhile holding her elbow in a 90 degree angle. Same with her knees and ankles/heels by pressing down on her knees and holding her ankles/heels. Do those compressions 10 times at each.

I probably will probably update about Wilbarger brushing and compression in about a month to see what differences I have seen in Clementine.

And as for speech therapy, the director at French International School questioned our intention for Theodore, since he is going to a French school is English speech therapy that important? At this point I think any therapy is important especially with speech for Theodore. Would it be confusing for him to go to an English and a French speech therapy?? That I have no clue. I am willing to give it a shot.

Autistic-Like

I came across the trailer of this movie about Graham Linthorst. A child who is mis diagnosis with autism which actually is sensory processing disorder. I have hope that we can get SPD into the DSM-5 classification that comes out in 2013, so children with the mild version would receive treatment accordingly.

One question was asked why is SPD under mental or psychiatric disorder. It is a neurological disorder and the impact in children is high because it takes in many form from socially inept, emotional tail spin and academic failure. SPD is a hidden disorder.

Psycho-educational Assessment

Today, I took Theo to Watchdog Central for a psycho-educational assessment so I may apply him into learning support at schools that offers learning support. We met with Judy Chow Fairhall a clinical psychologist. I spoke to her about Theo as she asked me questions about him.

Speech delay has always been a problem. But after her assessment, she feels that he is dyslexic in the phonetic aspect of language and not able to mimic sounds which would lead to poor reading skills. And also the fact that he is not well verse with his alphabets and numbers that would cause for even more concern at his age level. She addressed that his expressive language and skills are between age 3 and 4.

A year behind may not be a big deal to me because a child can catch up at different rate. But if he really has dyslexia then I can see those symptom surfacing because of him not interested in writing which would led to the disinterest in reading because everything is just too hard with letters, words and writing in general.

Theo does need a lot of visual cue to help him along with verbal direction repeated at least 3 times. If more than 2 steps direction is given then it is hard for him to decide which to do first. It is usually best to tell him to do one thing first and have him complete the task then add on to the directions. He also tends to be unsure by asking back if what he just did is correct or just asking for an approval that what he did is done correctly.

I do not know if any of this could be over done by a psychologist. Because one thing leads to the other. His fidgeting fingers could be ADD or SPD or because of his speech delay. Any disorder can cross over. But at the end Theo needs help in the language area.

Autism in the news

It is Friday and Theo went to his speech therapy session. I picked up a copy of The Standard and there was this article about an autistic teenager whose parents didn't know if her condition and led to a 5 years shopping spree of LV bags. The teen girl's parents purchased for her 1000 bags and even purchased a flat for her to store her LV bags.
This girl is 17 and the obsession started at age 12. Really who in the right mind would have a 12 year old lead to such indulgence of getting bags that is worth USD 1000 a pop.
Until her behavior turned bad that her parents had the sense to take her to see a psychiatrist.
Are the parents to blame? Maybe as a society we should promote child developmental awareness. If the window of opening to heal the child is at birth to age 7. We as caretaker of our future generation should be to look at the problem and solve it before if gets worst.
Maybe this article should be a warning to those instinctive feeling we have with our own children. And do not take those lightly.

Plan B

Dr. Ross Greene has looked into why a child is explosive. His approach to solving the explosive child problem is to investigate and find out what the child problems are and solve them. If you can't solve it yourself you can get help. All children has the motivation to do well, but lack the skills to meet expectation of you or any adults creates the challenge that makes them defiant. It is very challenging if a child lack the skills. And lack skills means frustrations and explosive behaviors.

I think it is all common sense, but sometimes we are hooked to get an easy way out by using authoritative voice instead of really looking for the problem and how to solve it.

My son is has speech delay and both my son and daughter has sensory processing disorder. It is due to the help of many people that we as parents were able to figure out what skills my children are lacking and how to help them. It is not a one day process. My son has been going to speech therapy for 2 plus years now and still going. He is improving gradually, but eventually there would be a breakthrough. My daughter is a very hyper child. I thought she was normal, but then she is wired differently. She is tactile defensive and she would scream and yell at the beach where any average child would enjoy sand under her feet, but not her. The water part she loves, but the sand part is unbearable. She will have the adults carry her across till her feet touches the water.

To keep priority is the key. It is not like I let them do whatever they want, but if I have to reason I would, but maybe when they are older. At age 3 and 5, you really don't have to go into extreme detail. And at this age they love to ask why. So keep the answer short and sweet. My son always ask why I always ask him to brush his teeth. Since he knows what germ is, I say to keep all the germs out and make your teeth clean, And sometimes the why can go forever. So I have books on brushing teeth and going to dentist or to doctors. And who doesn't likes stories.

The most fluffy buckwheat pancake recipe ... gluten free, wheat free, corn free, egg free, dairy free, soy free, nut free

This is adopted from Heidi from Adventures of a Gluten Free Mom!

http://www.adventuresofaglutenfreemom.com/2011/02/fluffy-buckwheat-pancakes-chia-egg-replacer-corn-free-baking-powder/

Dry Ingredients 

1 cup of buckwheat flour

1 cup of brown rice flour

1/2 teaspoon of cream of tartar

1/2 teaspoon of arrowroot starch

1/4 teaspoon of baking soda

1/2 teaspoon of sea salt

Wet Ingredients

1 egg replacer ( I used Ener-G)

2 tablespoons of grapeseed oil

4 tablespoons of agava nectar - light version

2 cups of rice milk 

I usually mixed all the dry ingredients together and all my wet ingredients together then mixed them both together. You really can't over mix this.

Food Allergies and SPD

Clemmie's test result came back today. The question is does the food allergies cause SPD or SPD cause allergies? or they are in a symbiotic relationship that they just irritates. Dr Sonal said on and on again with all the kids she has seen 80% resulted in the similar range of allergen.

Clemmie will go on a diet to eliminate the following:
corn
gluten
wheat
egg
cows milk
cashew nut
coconut
hazelnut
peanut
lemon
orange
grapefruit
pineapple
sesame seed
soya bean
and spinach

The blood test is done by York Test Laboratories in the UK. It test on food intolerance vs classic allergic reaction which is immediate. I remembered in high school my friend's friend is allergic to peanuts and someone accidentally threw a snicker bar and hit his forehead and the friend instantly hived with a red hump. The test result is not a 100%, but it is a good start. 

The diet will be for 3 months. It is going to be hard to eliminate all, but I am going to keep track of all she eats after we get back from Macau.

She is also on hyoscyamus which is used for basic therapy to treat strong emotions, behavior problems, spasms and jerks, silly laughing, jealousy, playing with genitals and exhibitionist.

Homeopathy

I took Clemmie to see Dr. Sonal at IMI in Central. I came across her blog trying to research about natural remedy, she mentioned treating a young boy with SPD with homeopathy. Not to get my hope up, but it is worth a shot.

The first consultation was 45 minutes long. She asked my a bunch of questions about Clemmie and she also notice her Clemmie's face with her "rash," but it really wasn't a rash just her capillaries surfacing close to the dermis layer of her skin. She told me that 80% could be due to allergy that we don't know about. I agreed to that so I asked her how would she test for allergies. She said do a blood draw and the lab in the UK will test it.

She gave Clemmie a prescription to start the treatment in neutralizing her.

I took Clemmie to get get blood drawn and that was a task in itself. The nurses and doctor at the clinic were very kind and understanding. We actually were there for half an hour. They all try to make her feel comfortable and offer her candies, but only after she let them draw her blood.

During the waiting, a mother and her two children came in. The older girl is getting her blood drawn, but her baby brother was the one crying which stirred up anxiety in Clemmie. Clemmie was asking what is happening to the boy and who is crying. It sounded like a slaughter house.

But at the end, we wrapped her up in a towel and I held her down with my body and held her hands. The doctors and nurses were swift in the matter. Clemmie cried in the beginning and at the end when the needle was out. She was offered candies for her bravery. I took her to get her favorite ice cream afterward.

Result will be due August 4th.

3rd OT session

I do not know if Connie is helping Clemmie since we just started it is hard to say. Yesterday was the 3rd session for both. According to Connie, Clemmie didn't get as frustrated as last time, but her transitioning into the sensory gym was all in all the same, she doesn't want to go in because she was busy with playing with the tea cups and serving tea. I basically had to stay with her for most part of her session. I can see what Connie meant when she said Clemmie relies on sight and seeing more than feeling it with her body. Especially with climbing up the ladder, she would stop at the second to the top rung and then use her knees instead of her feet to reach completely to the top. It is the matter of using her feet to feel, but she rather see a confirmation than use her feet to feel the object as a confirmation, which is also her tactile defensiveness surfacing to help her keep the sensation to manageable.

This time Connie turned on the colorful lights and light switches around the room that correspond to the different colors of the light. And each light switches require different pressure or area to turn on. And Clemmie has some strategy of her own to switch on and off from one color to the next. And she was not afraid to climb up the nylon hammock once she found a way to get out and it was less intimidating for her.

Theo had a short session due to unforeseen circumstances that I do not wish to mention. But his 20 minutes session turned out to be very productive. Connie suggested for Theo to have the listening therapy and if it could be done consistently with her during August to help him start his school year. She is concern about his hyper focusing when something like sound could be too much for him that he tunes out completely to stay sane. And we do have to speak loud and repeat a few times for him to register and interpret what the words mean. He needs visual cue most of the time for instructions. I have seen it in class if the teacher tells him to pick out the first letter of his name from a box with letters and then put it up on the board then write his name. He gets somewhat confused with how to sequence the verbiages giving to him into interpreted action on his part.

One thing I also learned is how important taste is. The sour taste awaken the senses and that is what they need to have those neurotransmitters be arouse. And having an appetite especially for Theo is important. I purchased the super sour candy balls and Clemmie loves those. The outer coating is super sour and the inner coating is sweet.

Sunday breakdown

I really don't know what to do with Clemmie when she has a uncontrollable tantrum in the public. But I am one of those parents who doesn't really care what other bystanders say because all I can do is to soothe her even if she decided to lay on the ground in the middle of the mall. It is either that or screaming. The mall security guy came by to see if she was okay and then told me that she shouldn't lay on the floor.

The reason Clemmie was upset was because the amusement park was closed until 12:30PM for an event and we were there an hour early. If I knew I wouldn't have taken the kids so early. And she is one of those kids who has no patience whatsoever and with her excitement to disappointment that led to an aggressive transition. I even took her to Toys R Us to pick out a toy and she refused at first and I was only able to contain her for 30 minutes. Within that 30 minutes she did pick out a piggie toy bank. And the rest was her breakdown of screaming and yelling and crying then eventually she lay on the ground I was able to give her deep pressure massage from her head to her toes which has a calming effect.

Started reading The Element

Can you imagine your child forced on medication because the school says "we got a problem child here"? We really have to look deep because all children are not mold the same and that doesn't mean one odd ball would equal "problem." I believe in potential. And hopefully I will find out just that about my two sensational kids.

Some child jumps around and can't sit still like my Clemmie, but that doesn't mean she can't learn. She can, but she just have to jump around and learn. She picks up languages and nuances and spits them out like she knew them from birth. She can pronounce words whether in English, Cantonese, French or Mandarin perfectly as a 3 year old can and retains those words in the growing brain of her.

I will have to help her work with transitioning to school and it may take her months, but right now she is very home sick and wants to go back home. We were looking at old photos and she said to me that she wants to go back and maybe go to an hotel to stay for a bit before going back home.

A lot has been going on this week. We started summer program at Les Petits Lascars located in Central. It was too much of a rush and Clemmie did not take it well and eventually she got kicked out of the class. I wished I had insisted to stay with her to transition her. It took her a month to transition at Bright Horizons. And with everything going on I can just imagine what is going in her head. Her anxiety and all. Theo on the other hand was doing well. Having a playmates made all the difference and he enjoyed the class as much as he can of understanding French. I still don't know what is the right decision right now. I really hope a miracle would happen in September that he could go to an English School Foundation system that has integrated program for speech therapy and occupational therapy.

I do hope in the near future that other teachers would not see them as problems, but help bring out their talents in them as much as I would love to see them blossom. The critical time is now at their age.

I truly urge other parents to seek help as soon as they can because the window of opportunity crucial at the age from birth to 6.

The OT said Clemmie is a very smart kid, smart enough to tell her what to do and smart enough to question with her curiosity. Theo will need to let go some control, but then sometimes being a perfectionist is required because sometime things are not allowed to cut corners. I hope he will develop his own rating system later on and have some flexibilities in between.

Theo's PT session was great. Rachel was able to see how much he could do and now we can all focus on his weakness and strengthen them. He is still weak at the arm and down to the fingers with is strength and grips. And also at the hips. His overall gross motor skills are okay. We need to do a bit of fine tuning of his fine motor skills that would lead to writing.

I am looking into getting the Handwriting without Tears program.

Tactile Defensiveness and Floppiness

This week Clemmie and Theo started their OT sessions and PT assessments.

June 30th

We were at the Watchdog Jordan for their OT sessions and we worked with Connie. She is really well versed and also very impressed with Judy's evaluation of Clemmie. She feels that Clemmie needs more OT sessions which I agreed. She feels that Clemmie's tactile defensiveness really gets in her way with her experience of the world. She is not able to get certain needs of her proprioceptive input and vestibular input because she is afraid or caution to touch certain textures or things which interprets all her manners to be of a two year old. She is constantly seeking other available and tolerable sensations to compensate for her tactile defensiveness. And once an input is not registered fully she moves on seeking for other sensation. And all the sensations are symbiotic, one causes other disorders to surface. Since she has tactile defensiveness her gross motor skills to her fine motor skills needs help which leads to her lack of confident issue.

Connie gave Clemmie a bubble container with a wand. It was hard for her to blow the wand to make the bubble because she couldn't create the right shape for her mouth to blow. The bubble container is a hard container with a slit just enough to fit the wand. She was struggling to fit the wand into the container and instead of trying with a little bit of twisting of the container or the wand to fit, Clemmie gave up all together after two seconds. Connie held her hand and did a slight turn and the wand was able to fit in. Connie suggested not to say anything awhile holding her hands so she can concentrate on the amount of shifting and pressure to complete the task.

For Theo is he is extremely cautious. She said most of the kids that comes in would attack the pit full of balls and throw them all around, but not Theo. He was eying at the Lego box for the longest time when we walked in the center. And once he was in the OT room the Lego box seemed ordinary and not much of a desire. He loves the rock climbing stones on the wall. Most of the time he played with the different layers of elastic hammocks. And Connie said his grasps are primitive with no thumbs involved. Maybe that is why he doesn't like to write because he can't grasp the pencil well or it is awkward for his body to have the thumbs be involved in stabilizing the pencil for writing. He always hold his pencil the drawing way, the exact way I was taught at drawing classes.

Connie said they shared the similar kind of defensiveness to sensation, but reacts differently to the simulation. And of course personality comes into play with it. 

Overall the new OT observation on both the kids are on the dot.

July 2nd

We were at Watchdog Hong Kong Island for their PT assessments.

Theo started his PT session with Rachel. It is more of an assessment because of his low muscle tone. And Rachel agreed that he should benefits strengthening his core center. She noticed that his right shoulder is higher than is left and he is leaning on the side. She said this may lead to scoliosis if not corrected. And caused by his low muscle tone.

Clemmie on the other hand would benefit from treating her sensory processing disorder first in order for her to even be still to listen to Rachel. She was all over the place and refused to do anything. The only thing that she enjoyed was the balancing bar. Rachel doesn't recommend Clemmie for PT, but she told me to help her with exercising. She noticed Clemmie's tip toes and suggested to massage her calves every night and gently tuck on her heal and do heal exercise even standing on a reclining platform would benefit and counter act the other muscles.

Clemmie's OT evaluation

Finally the report came from Judy.

The breakdown:

social and emotional :
behavioral outcomes of sensory processing is definite difference
emotional/social responses is typical range in coping
modulation of visual input affecting emotional responses and activity level is typical range
modulation of sensory input affecting emotional responses is definite difference
overall would impact her, but yet it could be behavior related

sensorimotor abilities:
auditory processing is probable difference
display over responsive and under responsive

touch processing is definite difference
sensory seeking is definite difference
may impact her ability to self-regulate and to response appropriately to her environment 

oral sensory processing is typical range
does not interfere

proprioception:
sensory processing related to endurance and tone is of typical range
needs work and will be a challenge

vestibular:
vestibular processing is definite difference
modulation related to body position and movement is definite difference
modulation of movement affecting activity level is definite difference
the difficulty to integrate vestibular input will display problems with attention, organization of behavior, communication and modulation of arousal

vision:
visual processing is typical
modulation of visual input affecting emotional responses and activity level is typical
yet observation suggested the opposite

Pulled elbow again and medical system

Clemmie second time pulling her elbow again. This time climbing up a bunk bed and slipped. Rushed her to the closes hospital by taxi Hong Kong Baptist Hospital. Dr. Constantine Au attended to her after we waited for 2 hours at this private hospital. Who knew that on a Sunday it gets so busy?!? The nurses were loosing their heads too running around from room to room and trying to calm one patient down then to the next one.

This time it was a minor pull. There wasn't a loud cracked like last time, but she was definitely not using her right arm. After 5 minutes of the doctor maneuvering her arm, she was back to normal and running out to the waiting room using both her arms. My parents were in awed. See that is what happens a child cannot fake those kind of broken arm. At least she slept for 30 minutes with her power nap awhile waiting for the doctor.

The official receipt came to HKD 250 = USD 33.00. My ER bill last time for her was in the USD 560 range. And we didn't get any health insurance in Hong Kong and we had an insurance in the US. At least with a day of work in Hong Kong, people can pay for their ER bill making HKD 28 an hour as minimum wage. Even at USD 10 an hour as minimum wage in the state of California people still can't afford to pay ER bill and they have insurance on top of that fact. This is a fallacy with the US medical and insurance system!

Thunderstorms and homemade playdough

This week in Hong Kong, we have a typhoon watch! There was an amber alert yesterday with thunderstorm warning. It has been raining whales off and on. We all stayed home.

A day to make some playdough to play and it is great for sensory diet.

1 cup of all purpose flour
1/2 cup of salt
2 teaspoon of cream of tartar (this keeps the playdough fresh)

1 cup of water
2 tablespoon of oil (any type of cooking oil: olive, corn, coconut)
1 teaspoon of food coloring

Mix dry ingredients in sauce pan. Mix wet ingredients in bowl and then gradually pour and stir into dry mixture. Cook over medium heat to high heat and stir it constantly until it forms into a ball. Remove to cool on wax paper. Store in airtight container up to 6 weeks.

Simple and fun!

01. Help little hands develop fine motor skills

02. Learn about colors

03. Learn about numbers and letters

04. Learn about opposites : big vs small, thick vs thin, hot vs cold
05. Cause and effect : cooking, mixing colors, using hands to create
06. Create conversations

Hot off the stove!

Yellow + Red = Orange

How many green bread man?

Infinite of creativity.

Herman Miller and spinning

What do they have in common? The chair that Herman Miller made is very stylish and it spins. Fun for any kid with SPD that requires a spinning diet. My hubby and my dad went out to purchase the most comfortable office chair at POSH. It is around USD 1000+. I almost floored when I heard the price. But at least we have something for Clemmie to spin around in and also for her to push me around in.

Lazy vs Crazy

Theo had his first school interview at American International School. We met the primary school principal Beckie Bouchard, who is a NoCaler and relocated to Hong Kong last summer.

The interview consist of recognition of alphabet and phonics sounds of the letters, shapes and counting probably to a hundred since Theo only counted up to 20 without a problem, and colors.

It is a really tough luck situation because Theo knows all those except for phonics sound and reading. The principal said reading starts at 3, which to me isn't a surprise.

She was really honest and realistic with us. She doesn't want to see Theo struggle and fail just as much as we do. And also from a business stand point, get the money for as long as you can and also keeping the school reputation. I am sure she was in an educational cultural shock and how believed the book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother written by Amy Chua. Besides just going to school, extra curricular activities from piano lessons to tutoring to get ahead are highly recommended and kids stay up to midnight doing homework. Hong Kong in an educational cultural stand point would be consider crazy by western standard and in Hong Kong standard western education is lazy.

I was raised the lazy way which here they call it the North American way, but the result yield a 4 years liberal art college educated me. But what is the Hong Kong way of education, as the parents here mentally view education is more important than health. I probably view mental health to be more important. Parents here would drive their young child into boot camp styled discipline and each one lives in a ridge robotic time schedule. This rigidity will backfire when starting college where parents are not the official time keeper. And the funny thing, colleges in the States are highly regarded. Despite all this prepping from birth which could yield the same result either from the crazy or the lazy path. But mentally would this Hong Kong society yield a free thinker? Some student couldn't go through college without their official parent time keeper to keep taps on them. And soon fail miserably because they are now free from living in their parental shadows, what are they to do with so many option yet to explore. My question still stands to produce a natural thinker or a by the book producer?

In a way, I am glad Theo failed as this system would fail him to be a child. But I do believe in setting those basic foundation and literacy is one of them.

At the end of the interview, the principal open us to many new possibilities. We are not the type of parent who would push our children into rigorous routine, but rather foster their natural talents and drive, hopefully away from our own shadows.

Dehydration

Hot and humid! Theo rather stayed in door. And Clemmie doesn't really care about the heat.

I took her for another outing at a playground and after 30 minutes the heat got me. But she refused to leave and we stayed for another half an hour.

The heat made her agitated and she refused to walk after running around like a nut. I was frustrated and she needed to go potty, but there was no restrooms around us. She ended up peeing anyways.

And her tantrum set in, I just kept on walking as she cried and ran after me with all the passerby wondering what was going on.

Clumsiness

I will call it the clumsiness tantrum. Clemmie has a few of those before. But now I understood the frustration. She knocked over a spaceship lego that Theo built by accident at 3:30am in the morning. And that triggered a tantrum that lasted 30 minutes long of loud and continuous crying and yelling. She wanted me to help her to fix the spaceship but I wanted her to calm down so we can do it together. I couldn't get her to listen to me even with simple commands. I had to grab her to her room and have her cry in the room so we don't wake anyone up.

My mom came out and started to shut off all the lights and try to get her into her room. I have to hug her and massage her back to calm her body down.

And as for my clumsiness. I got bruise awhile take a shower. It isn't pretty. I thought it wasn't a big deal of a bump, but now it is a huge purple blah on my knee. Sigh.

Walking up steep hills

Theo is feeling the Hong Kong heat and humidity and walking up hill was a fleet for him. He refused to walk up hill. And JP has to carry him up. We just have to keep pushing him to walk because there will be a lot of walking. And it will help him with his low muscle tone.

On the other hand, Clemmie was a trooper walking up quiet a distance to a mini playground closed to where we are going to live. But eventually she was tired out, but it was some great proprioception sensory diet for them. And at the end they were able to play at the playground and sit down to eat a meal after a great workout.

15 hour red eye

Yes, we survived a direct flight from Los Angeles to Hong Kong. My hubby and I were literally dreading this trip with the kids cause we don't know how they will react. But they were too tired at the end from the lines and waiting for security checks then once we boarded they slept. Theo slept for 9 hours and Clemmie for 8. That was only half the flight time.

But I was glad Clemmie stayed in her seat for the most part and the only time we walked around was to take trips to the restrooms. Theo was easily entertained with his iPad and the inflight entertainment system. We watched Tangled. What a cute movie.

Clemmie was excited about landing. She is a very impatience one and once we landed more lines and waiting by the immigration station. She was so loud in line, we couldn't do anything to stop her, and everyone was looking at us. Thank goodness a nice lady came by and actually let us go to the diplomatic line and we were out at the baggage claim in no time. And she was calm again.

And on the car ride to grandparents' place, both of them were so loud, I should have put myself in the middle seat. There is no getting around with sibling rivalry, we have to just keep them separate.

A reason

I am sure there is always a reason why SPD exist. We are all different. I watched Sir Ken Robinson TED lecture a couple months ago out of serendipity. I really love youtube, you never know what you can watch and it really open up my world. Of course there are still junks out there, but you have to swim through a bunch of bad ones to get to the good ones. And all this sharing of Sir Ken's ideas, really got me thinking about creativity and how the brain works and schools in general. Why do we have special schools for special kids and not have a school that mixed all the kids up and they can learn and feed from each other. Isn't the world like that ??? you live and work with people and you learn from other people because they think differently than you and you think differently than them.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iG9CE55wbtY

And to always follow your passion. What if the brain is predetermined for the passion you have and SPD that we may have in all of us pin points us to fill up the passion. SPD make you learn things differently once you know what your body limit is or maybe it is unlimited.

I do not know why Clemmie has SPD or why Theo has his, but they both have their own way of learning. Clemmie is a language guru, but not Theo. Theo loves to build things and those things are architectural and spatial, but Clemmie has no interest in that area at all. Clemmie loves water, but Theo likes water. Even if we are not paying much attention, we are still learning from our surroundings in a probably subconscious level.

At the dentist

My best friend is our family dentist. And today we went in to have cleaning done. I have never met kids that ever liked their dentists with or without SPD.

Going to the dentist has always been an ordeal for my kids.
Clemmie really did put up a fight for a 10 minutes cleaning. Dr Emily was literally pinning Clemmie down with her arm so she could't move and yelling "Stop Clemmie!!!" doesn't really help.

The only time both of them ever sit still for Dr Emily was when I took them for emergency sessions. They both have their fair share of banging their front teeth awhile sliding down the slide or from tripping.

Good that their teeth didn't turn gray and fall off. They are quiet resilience.

And on my end I had two cavities. Now I wonder if it is my age cause I rarely eat candies.

Great expectations

What a Saturday? I think I need to start thinking of positive thoughts in a general sense of what to expect of my kids and also of me and my reactions towards them and the people around us.
Maybe I am afraid of being scrutinized by others that do not know me, do I need to have a thick skin?

When my aunt invited us to lunch at Trump National Golf Course, I was already having a lump in my throat, how are my kids going to react to a new environment. Clemmie always get excited and Theo withdrawn after the excitement was over.

There wasn't a chance of stopping Clemmie from running back and forth or going up and down the stairs, but I do not want her to do it inside the club house. I took her outside kicking and screaming and try to distract her with everything and yes a stair outside! We probably went up and down the stairs 20 times. And a gentleman who saw her inside crying, commented how happy she was outside.

Theo on the other hand was having an anxiety attack. He usually was good with sitting down at the table, but he told me he was afraid of the people inside the club house. I think he meant the chattering noise of people talking and the unfamiliarity of faces. He was afraid to go inside and sit at the restaurant and had an hour of tantrum. He was running in and out of the club house. Thank goodness my nanny Maria was a good sport. She held on to Clemmie, as I took hold of Theo and try to understand his fear.

He also needed some vestibular input and wanted to be flipped upside down and after 5 minutes of flipping, he calms down. And he needed some big hugs and some rocking, too.

The whole time of having the hostess watched us going back and forth and in and out of the club house, I am sure she is wondering what the heck we were doing and why my kids were crying. Some guests were also stunned with sadden eyes or shocked with disgust.

After an hour and a half with nothing much to do since I couldn't just leave my kids and go in and eat. We head off to McD's play place. And enjoyed ourselves there.

The day activities makes night and day of my kids. I was dreading to go to dinner at Cheesecake Factory. JP and my parents took them. They sat through a two hour dinner without a fuss and even had dessert.

I am a believer of sensory diet and I hope my dad did, too.

Parents ...

can't stand them, can't live without them.

My dad is explosive when things doesn't go his way. And it is getting in the way of family dynamics.

I thought he understood what I was going through, but I guess not. I was really angry and frustrated when I became that explosive person. Trying to argue my side of the story. Which is exactly what was said in all the the stories of family with SPD kids or autistic kids, nobody understands the kid nor the parents, what they have to go through everyday.

It is hard enough to think how people will judge you like this one mom's story about her son wearing flip flops in 20 degree F weather because he can't stand having socks on his feet and threw a tantrum because of the socks issue. And other people thinking how she could have let her son get away with wearing just flip flops.

I have that same socks issue with my Clemmie. That was before I learn about her having SPD. She would keep taking her socks off, no matter how hard I try to keep those on her during the cold weather. And with long sleeved shirts, she would pull up the sleeves and take off her coat and run off like she was at the beach in 80 degree weather.
And during hot weather she would ask for a sweater.

Now I don't even bother about the socks. I got her some seamless ones by smartknits. Those stay on her feet longer but she has sweaty feet and eventually those will be off by the next hour or two.

After this transition phase is over I am going to set up some ground rules!

I discipline my kids the way I see fit and my parents can criticize all they want, but they have no right to take over the discipline when I am in charge.

Theo was sitting watching his iPad and it calms him just having the visual stimulation after coming back home from daycare. I am okay about him not eating because he is tired. And after an hour I asked him to shut off his iPad and place it on the kitchen counter. As JP scooped up the food he wanted into his bowl. Theo did not follow my instruction about putting his iPad away and I had to repeat like a broken record. I got the situation under control and met him half way, he answered me saying that he will leave it on the couch. Then my dad came in and grabbed the iPad away from him and started yelling at him and then the whole situation went south. Theo's tantrum and crying lasted for an hour or so when all this could be avoided at all cost. If we all give some patience and some respect and understanding.

Then my dad started his lecture about how I need to discipline my kids to sit for dinner. I can't let him just sit there and watch his iPad and not eat.

But pick the right battle. And this isn't the right battle when my kids haven't seen me for 6 hours and they want to relax and just do nothing and put their guards down for a bit then have someone yell at them for reasons they do not know why they should be punished.

And if it comes to the worst part no visiting grandparents' house. I know the kids cannot behave like the society wants them to behave. At least right now I have acknowledged that they are not the typical child.

I am really really having second thoughts about this move. If I can't get the help they needed I am moving back to get them the support that they and I need.

P.S. So the following day, Theo was still upset with grandpa, he pointed to grandpa's computer and told him to put it away cause we are having breakfast. lol.

Indian spices waking up the senses

Judy suggests to have Theo eat more flavorful food so I took an Indian cooking class today with Kaumudi Marathe at Surfas located in Culver City. I like the fact that it is what her website says Un-Curry. Theo likes chilly too, but I can make un-chilly dishes and just add some chilly for him to wake up his taste buds. He also tends to over stuff his mouth with food which means low muscle tone.

The class I took was called Meat Feast. We cooked up chicken, lamb and shrimp, since some students doesn't eat lamb, we used beef instead. A wonderful selection of spices were introduced, I never used cinnamon in meat dishes besides for dessert and sweets. I love the smell of green cardamom, coriander seeds and cumin seeds.

Both my kids like the westernized version of Indian food with a lot of tomato paste added to make the flavor more acceptable. Now that I have learned something new, I am going to add that to my cooking repertoire.

Definitely check out Kaumudi's cooking classes if you are in Los Angeles. I find not only the class was fun, but very informative in the historical aspect of India being that she is also a journalist by trade.

http://www.un-curry.com

The pool and an advice

Sunday, my mom's best friend threw us a farewell party. Just so happened her brother's place has a pool. Both my kids were delighted with the sight of the pool. JP was of course guarding Clemmie from falling in. I knew eventually she was going to get in and she did. It was so funny how she took off her clothes at the end without any worry and care in the world. My mom on the other hand was very concern and pushed me to take her out immediately. I wondered if she is concerned about how her friends' would think or the chilly weather, but the sun was out with a little breeze. And Clemmie loves the cold on her skin.

Theo was delighted but extremely caution about water. He just kneel by the edge of the pool to get a touch of the water with both his hands.

As the day progress, I tried to get the kicking and screaming Clemmie out of the pool once and she ended up back at the pool. I hate doing that to her. And I also have to deal with my mom. If no harm, no foul why can't the pool be Clemmie's outlet. Clemmie did take a miss step and fell in deeper by the steps, but she was okay. It happened in Hawaii and I grabbed her by the arms and pulled her right up. She is a swimmer. Next step is to get her swimming lessons.

I did asked for advice in dealing with non believer of SPD. Krissy, the director of admission at school, told me any criticism coming from one's mom is the most painful. It is so true. Being a mom can be cruel. I wonder if I would do that to Clemmie one day be hurtful and cruel when it is her turn to have her own children. I do not want to be that mom. Maybe it was how she was brought up with nothing and she rely upon herself.

Krissy's nephew is autistic with spectrum Asperger syndrome and she knows how it goes around family members. She suggested to lay a ground rules before going to places. And keep reminding them the rules. And she uses a treat as her leverage which she hates to do, but it works to keep things under control. All the places she suggests for family gathering would be outdoors that way the kids can be loud and they will not bother anyone. Her nephew is smart and he won prizes for his science endeavors. The next Einstein in the making. The mind is a beautiful thing.

What is going on this week of May 9th?

Recapping my week with their therapies and feedbacks.

Clemmie gets overly agitated when grandparents are in town and on top of that we have our move to Hong Kong which adds to her SPD. But we still need to look out for her behaviors that are not part of the sensory seeking. She is free spirited and full of mischiefs to begin with and her SPD brings it up a notch when she can't sit still to eat.

Judy helped me with identifying key behaviors that need to go with appropriate consequences. Listening is one and follow through with action is another. Just because at times the SPD takes over, we still need to remind her that she is in control of her body and will power can kick in with outside help. I always remind myself to use the phrase, if you can't do what I asked of you, I will have to help your body.

I tried not to go into spanking, but I do admit I get frustrated and at the last resort I spank to get full attention and she was able to stop her body then I know it was a behavior issue. And sometimes the spank would cause the SPD to arise more, that is when nothing works and I have to wait it out and help her get out of it.

I think I need to get help myself to cope with all this. I don't want to spank, to yell or to do anything of that sort. Maybe some aromatherapy can help us both to calm our senses.

Judy used weights on both kids. Clemmie with ankle weights about half a pound on both ankles to help slow her body down and also to keep her heels on the ground. (I think that if she can do her tippy toes naturally, dancing class should help give her the outlet and structure at the same time.)
Theo immediately put on the rubber wrist weights and he likes the ankle weights too. The pound of weights depends on the weight of the child. Since Clemmie and Theo are about the same size and weight around 40 pounds each, 3/4 to 1 pound each should be a good start.

I am also looking at weighted blankets for sleeping. Both of the kids sleep with each of us, Clemmie with me and Theo with papa. And I have read so much on the psychology of sleeping with your kids and it is bad for the kids and you, etc. But yet those arguments do not go into anything related to the kids' maturity level and what about kids with SPD? who rely on sensory input to calm their body down. Until the child has the idea of how to self soothe there is always an underline reason why some kids cannot do it. And I sometimes wonder why couples in the old days have separate beds. Maybe they are hypersensitive?

Theo has been working hard with his speech therapy. Cathy is always concern if he missed a session everything would fall back, which isn't the case and he proved it to her time and time again even after getting well from a flu, he was able to continue where they left off.

He has such great memory, it is mind blowing. He would remember how her desk was last week verse this week and attempted to rearrange her office back to the way he sees it. Maybe he could be an interior designer with his spatial skills.

Location:Kelton Ave,Los Angeles,United States

Weekend sensory diet

Saturday, we went to a gymboree party. It was so much fun for the kids. The staffs hosting the party were genuinely enthusiastic. And this place is a sensory diet for both Clemmie and Theo. Judy said she is definitely on the sensory seeking side. I am still trying to figure out Theo he could be in the hypersensitive side of the spectrum. But he grew out most of his fear by trying. I remembered him needing the push and encouragement to just climb up a ladder in the playground and stepping into one of those spider chains was mission impossible. Slowly and surely he knows his limit and pushed beyond and now he can climb without me guarding him every minutes.

At gymboree, he was pushing the giant rainbow ball that is probably 5 times his size and it was a great work out. And I really like the padded barrel, they were both in the barrel and I pushed them as they tumbled.
Theo enjoyed hiding in a clam shell filled with colorful pearls. Hiding in the dark calm his senses.

Clemmie especially love the whale ride which basically was a giant tube filled of air balancing on a half sphere awhile one of the hosts was holding on to one end of the giant tube to make it bounce and move. Similar to a bulls ride. And she never wanted to get off. At one point I felt really bad cause Clemmie refused to get off and I offered my help with two kids on board to maneuver. What a workout for all of us.

And then sugar high!

Happy Mommy's day

Everyday should be Mommy's day!

JP took charge of the kids today as I kept on packing. He took them to chuck e cheese and enough sensory bombardment for the day, but the kids love it over there. I find the noise extremely overwhelming. Maybe I have a sensory issue with noise and I never particularly like to listen to music.

I am looking into this hereditary issue with SPD.

We are not stupid!

This is my vent blog. I just have to get it out of my chest.

It is really hard to make people understand the condition of SPD. So many times I have been criticized as a not strict enough parent to get Clemmie to stay still for dinner or not to fidget. Or make Theo eat more because he is too skinny.

And this is coming from my own mother. How many times I tried to explain to her and gave her analogy that they were born this way and we are trying to help them. And I did ask her if she thinks that my cousin Kenny is not born with the extra X chromosome and is not a down syndrome. And my nephew Louie wasn't born with bad kidney's tubes which cause his kidney to be enlarged four times the normal size of a child. And she acknowledge those conditions, but doesn't believe the human brain could be born this way?

It is a lengthy process and an expensive burden and needs every ounce of commitment.

Maybe she wants to be in denial, but I thank my father for research and support. Or I would go insane if I hear anyone telling my children that they are stupid.

No trapeze nor monkey bars

I took Clemmie to her pedi today to check on her nursemaid's elbow. Everything feels and looks okay. But the doctor did suggest to put off all activities eg: trapeze or monkey bars on hold until she is six years old.

Once injured, it is easy to injure again in the same manner.

Now I am afraid to hold her by the hands. I do have a teddy bear leash, but it is way too tight on her.

And if I don't hold her hands when she is out on the sidewalk, she runs straight out on the street. Which happened today so I may just as well carry her. I did explained to her if she does what she did at the zoo again she will hurt her arm again.

Every split of a second becomes dangerous if she couldn't help to control those impulses of being fearless.

A surprise for me.

She did really well waiting in the doctor's room today. We waited in the room for 30 minutes. And we did some rearrangement of the chairs since she was fidgety. But other than that I am happy that she didn't throw a tantrum.

After the doctor, I took Clemmie back to class and she usually throws a dismay and will be so attached to my waist and wouldn't let go. Now for the first time we walked into her group and she actually sat down without me asking her to do so and she did not respond "no, I don't want to."

A happy camper!

A wonderful article written by a mommy

My dad actually read this article and told me to read it:
The Child You Didn't Dream Of by Priscilla Gilman, April 10, 2011 from Newsweek
http://www.newsweek.com/2011/04/10/the-child-you-didn-t-dream-of.html

From speaking with my preschool director, she was so happy that I am working with everyone at the school to solve Theo's and Clemmie's quirks. She said that most parents would be in denial since the parents feel that labeling the child would give the child disadvantages. I told her, I am no expert, so anything I can do to help my child I would do no matter what. I remembered reading a posting written by someone about his speech problems and he wished that his parents had done something about it. He wrote, if he had speech therapy at an early age, it would change his whole life.  Now, he is very self conscious and with very low self esteem because he can't speak properly and people thinks that he is retarded. I always have that in my head. 

The author's coming to term and realizing that her child needs help is a great step into actually helping the child. I was like her looking up all the possible things and trying to fit all the puzzles together to see the big picture. It is never too late to seek help. Late is better than never acknowledging the problem.

Theo and Clemmie are so lucky to have wonderful, caring people to play with: all the teachers and staffs at Bright Horizons at Water Garden, Santa Monica, CA, Betsy Cantor - child therapist, Catherine Owens - speech therapist and Judy Fishman - occupational therapist.

It is truly a brighter tomorrow.

Today, Cathy and I had a great laugh when I told her about Theo's vocabulary growth and usage. Theo and I were in the waiting room waiting for her and we were flipping through a magazine. He loves to make his own little comments about everything he sees. As I was flipping, Theo stopped me and said "look at his packs" pointing his finger at the picture of the muscular man's abdomen, I was laughing so hard. Then I asked him "how many packs?" and he counted out loud "one, two, three, four packs!"

Water play Sunday!

My sensory kids love water. For Clemmie, she always did and it doesn't matter if it is the deep end of the pool. For Theo, he likes it if the water is shallow and non threatening. I remembered when Theo was a baby, he was terrified of water. And he gradually grew out of it, but he still prefers to have short bath time or shower. Unlike Clemmie, her bath time lasts for at lease an hour or more.

A hot Sunday at 85F in Santa Monica. I took out our blow up water slide and mini pool and gave it a good scrub. This will be the last time we will be using it in the month of May. My whole family is moving to Hong Kong. The kids will miss having a backyard! I will miss it, too.

Good vibration and dark places

Theo went to his first meeting with Judy today. We only have a month left to get a diagnosis. Judy definitely see Theo needing fine motor skills tuning in order to gear his brain and hands to help him write. Kindergarten is coming soon and it is the right time to pursue this challenge. Judy said he could visualize what he wants to draw or write but his brain couldn't coordinate with his hand to create what he visualize. Theo is left handed which makes it a challenge for me to show him how to hold a pencil correctly.

I found out something new about my son, he likes dark enclosed space which I find refreshing. At night in the bedroom, he demands that at least one light is on at all times. I am not talking about night light but a main light in the corner of the room. Judy's guess is that he is afraid of something at night.
I guess open space vs close space makes for comfort or discomfort.

We skipped the trapeze with Clemmie because I want to be on the safe side and so does Judy after what happened at the zoo. And we found that she likes vibrating things such as the turtle pillow and a vibrator or a massager. Things to add to her sensory diet.

I found her a vibrating teddy bear.

Zoo and ER in one day

It was a lovely Easter Sunday at the LA Zoo. Who knew in one second the day would go south. What happened? I was holding Clemmie by the hand and all of a sudden she decided to go soft and basically drop her whole weight as I was still holding her by her right hand and that caused the dislocation of her radial. She does that quite often (known as hypotonic in SPD term, floppy body, like a wet noodle) which I was able to set her down to the ground slowly, but this time we were walking up hill and she took me by surprise. I heard a big loud pop, but she was not crying or anything. Since she couldn't even lift her arm after an hour, I had to take her to the ER.

The doc saw her and basically popped her radial head back in place in a split second and she did voiced ouch, but nothing more and in 10 minutes her arm was back in full range motion again. This is very common for children under age 4 and it is called Nursemaid's Elbow. The doc recommended to use a leash instead if I don't want a repeat episode again.

From Wikipedia:
Nursemaid's Elbow is a dislocation of the elbow joint caused by a sudden pull on the extended pronated arm, such as by an adult tugging on an uncooperative child. The technical term for the injury is radial head subluxation.

Bouncing is good!

Yesterday night, I finally blew up the Rody Max horse made by Gymnic. My kids love the horse and this morning they fought over it. So I am going to get another one. Great exercise and they are going to be cowboys.
There are two mini Rodys at the sensory gym and Clemmie loves playing with them. But because she is a big girl at age 3 I got her the Max size for age 6 and up! The mini ones are from age 3. 

First missed session

My baby girl missed her Monday OT session this week and she was all over the place. I can tell a big difference with her behavior.

My mom noticed that she became calmer after almost two months. She started her OT session in March. And she goes to her session twice a week after her first evaluation.

She went to her ST Tuesday morning. Cathy (the speech therapist) couldn't contain her. She was hopping around and didn't really sit still. Her body needs to move and couldn't control her bladder neither and had an accident in the car.

She needs her deep pressure massages and all the range of motions from swinging off a trapeze to sliding down a slide and bouncing on a ball. Those motions help calm her senses and make her brain connects to her body.

This morning she has her two left feet again, all of a sudden with nothing obstructing her path, she fell down on her knees. Ouch with bruises.

She used to have so many little bruises all over her legs either caused by accidents from loosing her sense of balance or by purpose she would jump off the couch and lands her knees on hard wood floor to feel the pressure. Just breaks my heart to see her all banged up like someone abused her.

I have several sticks of Hyland's bumps n bruises with arnica montana. Those work wonders. The greens and purples fade away.

Tomorrow is her OT session. Yea! She loves playing in the sensory gym with Judy (the occupational therapist).

My Journey

It is tough being a mom nowadays, but it is tougher when all you do is drive your kids around to therapist after therapist, before school or after school throughout the week. And thinking back, if I should have done anything differently or things I should or shouldn't have eaten during pregnancy. All these things start churning in my head. And crying sometimes is the best thing to let it all out of my system.

Two things I learn along the way are never give up and there is always hope.

My son was diagnosis with speech delay when he was 3. I never put much thought to his speech delay until I enrolled him to toddler class at age 2.5 and compared him to other boys in his class. My son was practically not talking.

He started at Bright Horizons in June of 2008. And I voiced my concern to the school director. She said to wait a little to see how he gets along and the talking will start.

We all waited to see if he will bloom in six months, but because he is not communicating like he should compared to an average 3 year old who could string at least 3 words together (eg: I want water), his behavior became a problem from his frustration to make his peers understand him. Instead of words, actions like pushing and hitting became his words to get others attention to let them know that he wants to play with them.
And the other children were afraid of him or afraid that they would get hit.

We even had a child therapist look at him to see if he shows sign of autism because sometimes I feel that he was withdrawn. We also had his hearing checked even though he passed the hearing test when he was a newborn. And everything was ruled out to focus on speech therapy.

My daughter was recently diagnosis with sensory processing disorder. She was also working with a speech therapist after an initial meeting with a child therapist. The teachers came to me first, in regards to her language understanding, I told them she speaks and understands, but understanding not necessary means follow directions. My girl has her own agendas. She spoke early and learn to speak Cantonese and English and French from my husband. She figured out to speak to me in Cantonese or English, my husband in English or French.

When she first started toddlers class I was concern about her behavior. She is not the typical calm child, she is adventurous and she couldn't really sit still for story time and she would run around when we go to a restaurants.

After several sessions of speech therapy, the therapist recommended that she see an occupational therapist. I had no idea what that meant at the time.

My boy and my girl are the opposite of the spectrum. I am also having my son diagnosis next week for SPD relating to his fine motor skill in holding a pencil correctly (he is left handed) I hope occupational therapy will help him to transition into kindergarten when he should be able to write his name.